(check my tweets more, im using that everyday since it's of more convenience for me.)

weeks since the previous update, school has been fine, busy with family matters and school stuff.
my grandfather was sent to NUH emergency last wed, he's fine now i guess, since he was able to be granted to be discharge. i just dun understand why siblings can just not wanna speak and interact with each other, no matter how serious and urgent the matter was. fuck kinship.

busy shifting and packing things in my room, my uncle's whole family is moving in with us, yes, in a 'four room' flat no bigger than 95sqft. that will be like 9 of us in the flat until his new flat is ready, they will most prob stay with us for at least a month. so no personal space, i will be giving up my bed to my cousin and will be sleeping on the floor since im the earliest to wake up. God will always provide ways out, it's not the worse yea.
oh and in the meanwhile, my beloved grandma is with us too, haha... everyday talking to her and just know that she's around feels great, although i still regret very much that i didnt stay up that night and talk to her before she passed away. it's gonna be 4th anniversary in a few days, but it just seemed like we were still waiting on her yesterday.

end of the month, im so fucking broke. practically negative value now. nothing much on myself.
and IM STILL BEND ON GETTING A MACBOOK
living life like a normal student. no money, no love, stressed and frustrated. yup, goobye.

it's been a week since i last updated.
so many things happened, and i've been there alone, worn-out, but im glad most has come to an end.
there were also things that i chose to bother myself with, even when i knew that i couldnt do much.

i made myself come home after school some of these days.
the feeling of 6pm at home is just so good, it's definitely different from 6pm in the office or anywhere else, even if it's being alone. i miss the feeling. i was never home, settled down by 6pm for many years. i do not know why my nose suddenly turns sour and my eyes dripping tears when im writing this paragraph..
i miss the feeling of family. i want to feel what a complete family feels like, it will be my biggest regret.

mummy's gonna be back in 6 hours time. hopefully it's lesser stress for me.
i think my body's really cracking up.i still feel very tired after sleeping for 10 hours.
i tried waking up after 7 hours of sleep, but the problem is still there.
googled and found that i might have anaemia, i should take in more iron.
well, at least im 'exercising' now, sometimes walking to school with shermin in the morning.

class has been great, so much better than previous one. at the very least, we are purer and less scheming than my previous class. everyday having fun conferencing in msn, fooling and joking around. they made me laugh so much today, so much.
im making myself keep a distance with anyone in class, dont wanna get close, well maybe except sabby, since we've known each other so much before this semester, haha. i should go live in the rural area, peaceful and away from everything in the city life.

dire quello che vuoi, è la mia vita ed è la tua bocca, non si influenzano reciprocamente.

Just woke up in the middle of the night, and went straight to switch
on my laptop and ordered Heroes on HMV, without hesitation of how much
the shipping fee was. I don't know what I was doing. Feel a little
regret to not be at hongkong now. I should have gone ahead with my
plan and go for the concert.
Go SuperGoo!!! 做妳想做嘅嘢，第一埸已過，聽日10╱10係重要日子，做好佢，以
天上睇住嘅佢同妳自己為榮！

Happy Birthday, A.

Feeling very heaty, pekcek and mangzang. Probably because of my teeth.
It ain't getting any better. I feel like I'm on a verge of having my
blood vessels burst. Just hope that it will go away by tmr or else
people will get offended. Ciao.

so i was saying how can a freaking metal, steel wire break into two?
it was so annoying poking into my lips...
and so, i whined to my mum over sms and made her wake up at 8am london time, just to msn me about wad i should do.
in the end, i cabbed over from woodlands dunno where to woodlands ave 6 before 4pm and to only find out that the doctor wasnt in. so i made a booking at 7pm.
meanwhile, i bus-ed back to causeway point, got the bag my mother has been dying for, renewed the popular card, roam around the levels and bought sweettalk.
left CWP at 515pm and headed back to ave 6 to take dinner.
sat at the staircase well for an hour and got my braces done.
new wire, and it's blue now. now all the parts of my mouth, except for the tongue is sore.
and i still have my chicken cutlet waiting for me!!! thank god i finished my foot long subway(in three parts).
dinner and tv time!

third day of school.
today's module is dumbish dumb.

my braces wire broke, metal, broke. and it's really annoying me cos it's poking my lips.
anyway, got foot long subway sandwich to eat. six inch in first meeting, and three inch in second meeting, now left three inch. going to causeway point later to kaikai awhile. haha. getting things for my mama.
i think im broke already, but still, STARBUCKS, im coming!

Second day of school and I was late. Told myself to wake up when I did at 7.30am. Reached classroom at 9am. Half an hour late. Waffled in 1st break and worked throughout. I totally had a hard time catching up and understanding the problem today. Thanks azrul for the help. Haha. No lunch. Bought a drink to soothe my stomach before I took medicine. And urgh omg, the cream that I had to apply in my eye, made its way to my mouth today alot of times. It was so awful and bitter, a poison stated. Yuck, met up with eliza, the ponten queen, and erryne afterwards and left suddenly to meet my uncle. The stupid cabfare was like fucking $12 to my office from school. I swear I'll never take cab again unless I really need it. Ate lunch and slept for awhile, RJ-ed, chatted with mummy on msn on the journey back home, till just now. Was showing her tv shows. Haha. Tempted her with the pasarmalam food and stuff just below my house. Haha. Evil me. And now, I need my precious sleep very much. Goodnight. 

i dont know what i am doing, i dont know what i can do.

my eyes have been in pain for many days, i think i will go blind soon.
even washing them with that Optex or something doesnt help.
i need healthy lifestyle. i just realized that ever since last friday, other than talking on the phone with clifford, i have spoke less than 700 sentences. im not kidding.
and also ever since last friday, i've had ALL my meals alone.
im in pain.

im so tired today, slept for 6 hours and woke up at 8.
went over to uncle's place to pay respects to grandma.
watched richie rich while having round-2 breakfast with cousins.
left at 12. reached home, first thing was to switch on aircon and back to sleep.
woke again at 430pm and off to Serangoon for BBQ dinner. made my own waffles again.
came back all stinky and smelly.now i need sleep but i cant sleep.

im loving the lyrics of Believe in Dreams-Flyleaf.

Emo is back. I am feeling so negative recently, I just feel very bad,
very negative. There isn't any good feelings about anything I come in
contact with. I hate all those lies. I hate all those memories. Just
fuck my life. It's just so hard to stand up and start all over again.

i feel so sick...
caught flu because my aircon was too cold.
and i have been sneezing and sniffing for the whole day and im having headache cos of it.
and i also dun understand why even though i have been sleeping early, i still never feel like getting out of the bed...
moday's coming and im just glad that sabby is in my class. a pity that shermin is not with us, it would be fun everyday if we all were together.

So I'm here with my iPod, with so much resent I have for my house
broadband and sometimes with my mobile broadband. They can just cut
you off like that, while you are in the midst of doing something
relatively important at one time or another. And it's like you know
you can go tackle the modem or computer about it, but you get pissed
when it happens at a time like this, 1.54am. I'm just gonna send this
email when I can.
So boring day today, had a surprise in my mailbox today. Then
blablabla, went to the bank and guess who I saw, John my good old
friend. Haha, just reminds me of going to his lanshop below mine and
playing CS. Like in primary-sec time!?!?!? And all this ass gotta say
was, 'wow, long time no see, you've gone so fat.' thanks for the
compliment dude.
Gave up on the idea of getting my bus concession tonight and of
getting groceries at central. Went home and slacked in my room, with
the aircon already turned on. And then, ring ring, Clifford called me.
I knew he was up to something, if not he would never call me out of
the sudden. Sorry dude, I can't have dinner with you tmr. Tonight was
the night of secrets, 2+ hours of it, haha, I dun tell his secrets
unless he outs me. Thanks dude, i appreciate it. Wait
till we all gather in December and I will tell the whole group
alright? ;)
Its 2.10am, I wanna give up and go to sleep. Goodnight.