Thursday, March 12, 2009
mood:very down and awful. just finished crying badly and writing of diary.
i'm back in singapore for a couple of days already and sorry for not updating.
been busy with my prep for enrollment and stuff.
i've been having troubles sleeping since i came back;
i think anyone would if they had their room made-over without their consent and with so much stress weighing upon.
my mood has been badly affected and i have no room for a break.
everything is crashing. and i've no trust in god or anyone else;
im alone. the thoughts of running away and suicide are back.
i've nowhere to go to to cry or hide; not even here.
i think im still able to be thankful to be thinking of ways to distress than ways to suicide currently.
i need a good run; in rain is better. anyone with me?
and im having second thoughts to have kids so that they wont even have possibility to have this awful feeling of mine.